Usage and Warning Label

Use only as directed for occasional amusement or entertainment. Read all warning information carefully. Consult a doctor if exposure to irony, sarcasm, and satire causes irritation or disorientation.

  • Active Ingredients. Satire, absurdity, irony, wit, creativity, imagination, Christian faith, mind-altering exposure to life with four daughters.
  • Uses. For the treatment and temporary relief of countless warty little absurdities.
  • Warnings. Do not use this product if you are humorless or may be humorless or are a member of upper management. If conditions worsen, you’ve got serious problems and should seek the advice of a competent specialist, such as a politician who promises to give you hope and change based on impossible utopian schemes.
  • Inactive Ingredients. Passive verbs.
  • Purpose. Absurdity suppressant.
  • Directions. Take as much as you like.
  • Other Information. Read in a safe environment where humorless people, unimaginative minds and management types can’t see what’s on your screen.